Girl Problems...

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Apr 25, 2002
Alright so a couple weeks ago, me and this girl who lives on my floor here in the dorms started talking. I'd seen her around every once in a while, but we never said much other than "hey" and "what's up". Well we started hangin out, we'd go out for a cigarette and shit was cool, I was really startin to get into her. One night she finally invited me to her room and we stayed up til like 5 in the mornin watchin t.v. and just talkin. And we did this for a couple nights in a row, and I'm not a very talkative person, especially when it comes to females, I don't know, I just seem to hold my tongue sometimes. But when I was with this girl she just got me talkin about all kinds of shit, ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, family, religion, school, and sex (we were watching KiDs, great movie to spark some sex talk). She was talkin about how her old boyfriends treated her so badly and how her parents hated em, and she was listing off the characteristics of what she wanted in a man, and no shit, I fell into about every category, but kind of played it off. She was like "are there any good guys left out there?" and I just smiled and said "oh, I'm sure there's a few, you never know where you might find em." She smiled this sexy ass smile and we just kept talkin into the night.

I was really starting to like this girl and I'd only really been hangin out with her for a few days. Then on like that Wednesday, we were layin in her bed and I said something like "you can kick me out whenever you want, if you're tired" and she was like "no, I like your company". So I ended up stayin the night with her, nothin physical happened, but it was just the shit for me cuz I've never really had something like that, a fine ass girl that's on the same wavelength as me on a lot of shit. So the next night, we were thinkin of something to do, we were bored as shit, she called her girlfriend and decided to go over there. I gave her a ride over there and she was like "I really wanted to hang out with you tonite" but she hadn't seen her friend in like a week. So I just told her to come wake me up when she got back. And she did just that, about 2:30 rolled around and she was tuggin at my arm. I pulled her up in my bed and we started kissin and foolin around. It was great man, for real, best I've felt in a long time and I wasn't even gettin laid. I was just with this beautiful, exciting girl and I was lovin every second of it.

A few nights before she was saying how she wanted an affectionate man who would treat her right, and not to talk myself up, but that's me, that's how I am with girls. I'm not a womanizer by any means or whatever you wanna call it. And with this girl I wanted to do nothing but be affectionate towards her. And she was lovin it to. It was one of the best nights I've had. So we stayed up until like 7:30 in the morning, and I had class at 8, but I did not give a fuck, I was on top of the world. So that morning was the day we were all leaving for break, so for most of the afternoon we were just layin around makin out and just chillin. And right before I left we had a long, passionate kiss and things were lookin great. I had never felt the way this girl made me feel. But then came our break, and I was already afraid that 10 days was too long. It would give her too much time to think about shit. And my fears came true.
Apr 25, 2002
I came back Sunday night and was headin outside to smoke a square, and ran into her comin up the stairs. I was hoping to get a big hug and kiss, but she was actin shady as hell, talkin about needin to do all this homework and shit. I knew something was up. So the next day I catch her right before she's ready to go to her girlfriend's house, and I asked her what's up. She told me how she's content with how things are, being single and what not. She told me that I was great guy or whatever, and even though she's lonely she just didn't want to get involved because she said she knew she was gonna hurt me eventually. I asked her how she knew that without even giving it a chance and she just asked me how I could know that she was right for me. And I told her straight up that no other girl has ever made me feel the way she made me feel. She brought out a lot in me that I've never really been comfortable with around females. I told her how in just two weeks she got me so fascinated in her, and that's never happened before. She said how she felt bad and didn't know what to say. She said "I'm just one girl" and "everything happens for a reason", and that's when I finally realized that there was no changin her mind. And that's the part that fuckin kills me, and I told her this. I told her how I thought I had something special, a down ass girl that I've got so much in common with and someone who digs me as much as I dig her, but then everytime I get close to something good in my life, it gets fucked up somehow and slips out of my grasp.

But I got sick of tellin my sad stories, and I finally just gave her a hug and said I wish she would change her mind because I thought she felt the same way about me as I did her. But she said she's really happy she met me because she atleast found a great friend, and she asked if that was bad to say that. And I just said I wish it was more than that, but that's your decision and I can't do anything but accept it. So she finally left and I've been feeling so unbelievably shitty ever since. We said that we'd still hang out, but I just don't see it happening, cuz I think shit would just be weird and uncomfortable, even though I'd still love hangin out with her. I talked to her earlier today and she asked me why I was in a bad mood and I just kind of laughed under my breath and told her I wasn't in a bad mood, but I wasn't in a great mood, I'm just living, that's all I can ask for. I told her to find me when she got back later, but I don't see that happening.

All I know is that this whole situation has got my mind so twisted, it's hard to fuckin handle. This kind of bullshit makes up the blueprint of my fuckin life, and it sucks. And I don't know how I'm gonna fully recover from this, because I'm gonna see her almost everyday and I won't be able to get her out of my head. But who knows, maybe by her saying "everything happens for a reason" it meant that we'll hook up later. Or it could just mean I'm going to continue to get shit on for the remainder of my life. I've always said not to let a woman get to your head, but I can't even follow my own advice in this situation. My head's all fucked up is all I know.

I just needed to get this shit off my chest, if anyone reads this entire thing, then you might as well post something for your troubles. If you got any good advice, lay it on me. Tell me what I'm doin wrong, cuz I sure as fuck don't know. I think I'm just cursed or something, maybe I'm not meant to be with a beautiful woman who I like spending time with and vice versa. Maybe I'll just pursue the big skeezers that infest this campus from now on. Less stress on my heart strings.

Thanks for reading this

~One Fucked Up College Kid~
Dec 18, 2002
Everyday im suprised to hear this kinda story. You were USED, her ex-boyfriends weren't assholes, shes a cheating bitch. The chick needed some emotional care and found you. She sucked what she needed outta ya and moved on. I can tell you right now the girl was never interested in you. She has daddy issues and needed the attention and found a sympathetic guy like you to fill the need. Let it go, take it as a lesson and feel good about the little time you had with her. Don't let this ruin your idea of woman in general, this bitch was just playin games. Good luck wit it.
Feb 9, 2003
Yup. KrypticFlowz got it down. She is a user, she used you as an emotional crutch. There are times when you cannot decipher if she is or isn't using you. In which case [if she is using you] I would recommend you turning the tables on her.

Women are, as stereotypical as it may sound, fragile and emotional creatures and so I would have tried to make her think that it was you, and not her, who used the other person. You could have acted like she didn't hurt you and that you only used her for the sex. If she is like the majority of women she would have instantly been a lot more attracted to you, because women love assholes, in which case you would have had her in your hands and could have then crushed her emotionally.

Just my advice....oh and next time break your post up homie, its hard to read it all as one big paragraph.
Oct 8, 2004
I think I'm just cursed or something, maybe I'm not meant to be with a beautiful woman who I like spending time with and vice versa.
~One Fucked Up College Kid~
thats how i feel about women... and everything in my life actually
fuckin cursed... by demons.....

but rule number one never trust a BITCH!!!
good thing you never let her borrow money....
she used you emotionaly.....
but my friend let this girl he liked....
borrow 5 g's and that bitch ain;t payed it back...
i told him.. how could you be so dumb!!!
dammm he surprieses me sometimes...
i;ve been played emotionally before....
but i ain;t letting no fuckin ho.. take my money...
fuck dat....

i don;'t trust women....
when they tell me things now.. im like whatever..
yeah sure... like ima believe your bullshit...
ain;t no luv in this world...i;ve realized that now... at tha early age of 22...
only demons.. death and darknes...
and real...
everything is some fuckin fake bullshit....

so in conclusion.. i wanna say fuck luv...
and fuck tha world... !!!

but yeaah thats my view on this... matter.. guess im just ventin a lil here... fuck it..

-Mista Murda.. Tha walkin dead thug... :siccness:
May 16, 2004
Mayne...You shoulda..
Mayne If I was you I woulda..
I woulda played off her emotions at the time, poisoned her, face fuck her, take her purse and leave her passed out next to some of my dirty socks on the floor with a dildo stickin crooked out her ass.
I dont know man. I feel empathy for your situation cuz I know I have felt dumb and hurt by a female before but I guess in my past in that situation I put myself out there like a dumbass and probably looked as stupid, innocent, and as vulnrable as a little kick dog. So You were sitting there listening to her true feelings and she truely felt them but only for right then. When men are refered to as (Playas) my concept of that term is to be able to play off of a broads emotions to benifit my sexual/emotional/financial desires or situation. When I used to go to dance parties at 2nd and Jackson every punk beeziod is thizzin and if you dont finish them basically on the spot the feelings change by the minute. Just like a tough sale for a sales person. Seize the opportunity. Maybe this is why men in general are so cold when it comes to their female game. They dont want to put themselves out there for the fear of being emotionally hurt.
Moonpizzles last words:
No broad is a 10 in my book.

wait...I take that back...A 10 is a 9 that swallows. Good look my friend.
Feb 27, 2005
Shit man i think you were used as a rebound man. But i could be wrong. All i can say is let this shit ride out because i've been in a similar situation and there's really nothing you can do but wait and see how it plays out. and that feeling of awkardness is normal because i've felt the same exact thing before when i met this chick way back in the day man. But now we cool as fuc. If this ain't good advice i don't know what is then.
Apr 25, 2002
Maaaaan I feel for you.

You fucked up telling her how you feel. Never tell a girl how you feel. Let her know by action.

What you need to do is act unfazed by the situation. Act like you just don't give a fuck what happened with her. Who knows maybe you will get to hit it.

She may have liked you but when she went on break somethin happened with her ex or some shit like that. From your description it sounds like she was into you, even though you took way to long to make a move.

Like I said, act unfazed by it all. DONT call her, let her call you. If you all hang out keep trying to put the moves on her if she isn't havin it then NEXT the bitch. If you really have feelings for her the friendship will not work, she will just use you cause she knows you want to hit it.


Spanish Springs
Jun 21, 2003
Vista and Hubble
You opened up too early homie,ive done this before,you had the chance to bone and she would of let you,you cant wait for the green light,just had to take it.Forget that bitch,plenty of hoes around ,shit your in college. And If she sees ya with another female shell be all over ya....
Jul 20, 2002
When a some women say they want affection, they mean they want you to fuck them and pull their hair. That last night yall were making out, you should have tried to eat her out or somthing becaus 10 days is a long time for a woman. so many dudes and not enough time to fuck all of them. Maybe she isn't like that but you wouldn't know because you just lost her. Stop being Ralph Tresvant to these bitchs and pull out your dick when yall alone.
Jun 27, 2002
wow..i actually just read that and it seems like you need to get out a little more now....cause your dwellin on it too much for one.... let her see that it affected you...thats a shoulda acted like everything was all good and you werent majorly affected by her using you...she woulda came running back...

3. you let her see that she was the only girl in ya life expected too much too shoulda felt her out more (more then you did) before expecting a hug kiss gf/bf/ typa thang.....i've bren there, and yeah it hurts, but never let em see ya sweat kid....never....

im bad at reeading all the replies before i type, so someone mighta already told you this.....


Sicc OG
Nov 19, 2002
i hate to catregorize women cuz i love my momma and i love all women but in reality...cant tell them apart from the next one...when a bitch starts crying about how shes been treated like shit and how she needs a man who is a good man blablabla, its all talk, next week theyre hanging with some guy whos cheating on her, beating her etc etc...dont think too much of it...the bitch is a lcheating bitch.
Oct 26, 2004
Give her space, if she is what you say she is she will return!

When you say making out is that just kissing and cuddling, or f**ging? I encourage you to keep your head up. I feel your pain. Sometimes when a woman has been hurt all she needs is time to heal. So to me she had time to think like you said. She put the brakes on time to analyze what the situation is so that maybe she will not get hurt or hurt you. All you can do is give her the space that apparently she is asking for. And for future reference. Take your time as well. Analyze does this person want you as much as you want them that way you will not be setting yourself up for failure. YOU DID SAY THAT YOU WERE IN SCHOOL RIGHT? COLLEGE =BOOKS. NOT LOVE OR ROMANCE
Apr 25, 2002
@ KrypticFlowz:

I definitely feel like I was used, but I really don't think she's a cheatin bitch. When we were talkin about her ex-boyfriends it wasn't like she said all they were was bad to her. She just said that, with her last boyfriend, he ended up cheatin on her more than once, and she ended up going back to him and ended up gettin hurt even more. We were just talkin about past experiences with relationships, and that's when she started namin off what she wanted in a man, which made me really want to pursue this girl. But I feel you on the needin affection and shit, it's possible that that's all she really wanted out of it. But I really thought she was feelin me, that's why I don't understand it. She obviously fooled the shit out of me.


A while back I believed that women are attracted to assholes. But I don't fit that persona at all, I just can't be an asshole to a girl that I'm tryin to get at, it ain't me. And I see what you sayin by turnin the tables. I probably shouldn't have spilled my guts to her about how I felt about her, cuz that just shows weakness. But even if I had tried that, it wouldn't have been to crush her emotionally, cuz you never know what could happen, we might just hook up down the road. But I'm not holdin my breath til then.

@ 40ozThugsta

Yeah homie, if there's one thing I've realized throughout the past couple of years, especially where I'm from, it's hard to believe what a bitch tells you. I swear they all got a screw loose up in their head in in turn they use they shit to play with our mind. And a hate to say it, but that shit works, I'm fucked up over this whole thing, and I told myself I'd never let something like this get to me. But like I said, I thought shit was starting to turn for the better for me, but that shit backfired and blew up in my face.

@ moonpizzle

I didn't really put myself out there like a dumbass. Like, I was just havin a good time hangin out with this girl, even though I wanted her so fuckin bad at the same time. And then that shit happened the night before break and that's when I was on top of the world, thinkin shit was gonna start gettin better for me. But then when she got back from break and told me she was happy with just bein friends and shit I got all confused, cuz I didn't know why she decided that she didn't want it to be more than that. And I'm obviously not much of a playa cuz I really didn't benefit much at all from this whole situation, except fuckin pain and confusion.

@ xcalabar3

I don't think it can be considered as a rebound, cuz she's been away from her ex for a while. But I guess it could be a similar case. I just know that regardless of whether she wants to be involved in a bf/gf relationship, I still wanna stay close to her, because this girl opens me up, and I like that shit. I just hope and wish that shit could go back to before we kind of got together, when we were just hangin out, enjoyin each other's company. And like I said before, you never know, she might end up realizing that she's missing out on something good, someone who's gonna treat her how she wants to be treated. And she might want to give us a chance. But, then again, she might not.
May 13, 2002
This is what you gotta do:

Buy some cheese nips and pick some daisies. Then, get a portable boombox and make a tape with this song:

Lisa Lisa and The Cult Jam "Heat to Toe"

Go to her dorm room, start to play this and start to sing it. Give her the daisies and feed her the cheese nips. Believe me, half way through the song, this girl is gonna be taking off her clothes and gonna be ready to fuck.


Sicc OG
May 18, 2002
she is going to be expecting you to be all on her and shit like that, because you already laid all your cards out from the as far as she concerned your predictable and she knows that she can pretty much have you when she ready....instead I know you might not want to , but flip it on her..don't talk to her and do your thing..I hate to say it but If she comes to your for some advice ...or some shit be an asshole..let her know that it's not your problem or some shit.

it's kinda like when your arguing on the phone and the girl hangs up on you she WANTS you to call her back...but If you ever noticed that when you don't call her back the girl will call you back and say "why didn't you call me back"...DON'T PLAY IN HER GAMES THATS ALL SHE WANTS!!!!!!!!!
Apr 25, 2002
@ jay deuce

Even though the shit hurts, and I feel shitty about the whole thing, I'm gonna try and not let her know that it's affecting me. But that can backfire too, she might think that I wasn't even interested to begin with. But when I think about that, who gives a fuck, she did the same shit to me. I just know that it sucks that shit had to happen right before we went on a 10 day break, cuz that's just too much time to think about shit. But obviously something else played a part in her decision, but what that thing is I don't know. I guess it could have something to do with her ex, or her friends, or god knows what. And yeah, it'll be hard to keep a friendship with her, and that's the worst part, cuz this girl is cool as shit. But she's always gonna know that I want her, which will just put a strain on shit I have a feeling.

@ DV$1 aka Grumpz

That's my flaw right there homie, when I see something I like I open up too quick. You hit it on the fuckin head. But in another post someone said that I took too long to make a move. All I know is I didn't really put the moves on her or vice versa, it just eventually happened cuz we were both diggin each other, or so I thought. And yeah, I've got two of my (girl)friends coming down to visit Sunday-Tuesday, and they're both fine as hell, so maybe if she sees me with them she'll start gettin jealous, like biancas do best. Or she'll think I'm just a playa and she'll feel stupid for fuckin with me at all, even though she knows I ain't like that. We'll see how that works out.

@ Sav_Scorcese

Believe me homie, the thought had crossed my mind more than once. But I didn't know how to go about it, since we had only been hangin out for a few days at that point. And I definitely agree with 10 days being too long, and for all I know she could've had hella people runnin a train on her...for all I know. I don't see that being the case, but you never know. I just have a feeling there's some other reasoning behind her decision.

@ mustynutz

It's not easy tryin to forget about what happened, but it's not like I'm locking myself and my room and lettin it tear me apart. But once again, you're right about showin my emotions, I should've held back and not said as much. But we were never really "together" or "seeing each other" or whatever the fuck you want to call it, so it's not like she was the only girl in my life. And to be honest, I never thought I'd even get as far as I did with this girl, like we were just hangin out then all of a sudden it got personal, and then we were apart for over a week and that obviously hurt things. I don't think I was wrong for expecting a hug/kiss when I saw her after we got back from break, cuz that's the terms that we left on. But shit wasn't the same and I realized that pretty quickly.

@ askG

I totally agree with not being able to tell one girl from another. Like I said before, all women, my mother/grandmother included, have something loose up in they head, and it's only used to fuck with our (men's) heads. And she wasn't cryin about her old boyfriends/shitty relationships, we just happened to start talkin about that shit. And that's when she started talkin about the characteristics she was lookin for and almost everything she said matched how I really am. And at the time I thought it was quite a fuckin coincidence, but she obviously didn't feel the same way. And I've been in a similar situation where the girl I was feelin went back to the man who she said treated her so bad. It don't make no sense, women are so fuckin confusing, I don't think their made to be got.