181. Sorry....I over slept and I forgot to come in for the first day of work at my new job. Is it OK to come in tomorrow?
182. I once told my boss that I had converted to Krishnaism and since it was the Maharishi Guru's birthday I couldn't come in because I had to go to the temple to worship. It worked.
183. I can't come in today because the lady at the end of the road has just hung her wash out to dry and I don't want to drive down the road, cause dust, and she'll have to do her wash again.
184. Man does not show up to work, the boss calls and he says where are you. The man says I'm sick and won't be in. The boss asks why didn't you call? The man replies that the squirrels ate through his phone line. The boss mentions that he was talking to him this minute on the phone. The man replies that the squirrel only ate through the outgoing line.
185. A girl at work who always seemed to miss work a lot came up with this good one. She lived with her parents and her parents were on vacation. She told the boss she had to leave early because her parents were out of town and the dogs, the cats, and the bird did not like to be left home alone. So, the boss let her go home.
186. This one is true! A co-worker called in and said her dog ate her underwear and she didn't have any clean ones to wear. She said she would be in after she did some laundry!
187. I cannot come into work today. I have nausea, dizziness, body aches and vomiting. These are secondary symptoms brought on by the birth of my child yesterday.
188. A co-worker of mine used all of these in the same month: I'm sick...My girlfriend is sick...My girlfriend is pregnant and I have to take her to the doctor...My car broke down (he has three)...It's too windy...There's too much snow on the ground (he has a four-wheel drive, and the co-worker who lived two blocks away didn't but still made it in. I had a co-worker at a beef plant who's paternal grandfather died in September three years in a row.
189. I won't be in until later. I'm on Hawaii time during the morning, so it's only 6a.m. In the afternoon I'll revert back to local time.
190. I won't be into work today, or anymore. I just got a letter saying that I may have won 20 million dollars.
191. I was late for work because the night before my boyfriend and I were having sex and he decided to handcuff me to the bedpost and he forgot to bring the key so I had to wait till he came back with it and it was late the next day he loved it ...I did for awhile...true lol my boss laughed and that was it.
192. I live in a major metropolitan area, and my co-workers and I take public transportation to work. Living in the north we get our fair share of winter storms and snow accumulation. One day it had snowed about 12" of snow and I and another coworker started out to work walking the three blocks to catch the bus and then after the bus dropped us off, walking another 10 blocks through all the snow to the store. Boy were we amazed when a co-worker, who lives two blocks from the store, called to say she could not make it in because there was too much snow and the sidewalks were not shoveled!!!!
193. I once told my secretary not to expect too much from me this morning as I was suffering from from a mild case of mushroom poisoning following a trip overseas. I had a remarkably easy day one!
182. I once told my boss that I had converted to Krishnaism and since it was the Maharishi Guru's birthday I couldn't come in because I had to go to the temple to worship. It worked.
183. I can't come in today because the lady at the end of the road has just hung her wash out to dry and I don't want to drive down the road, cause dust, and she'll have to do her wash again.
184. Man does not show up to work, the boss calls and he says where are you. The man says I'm sick and won't be in. The boss asks why didn't you call? The man replies that the squirrels ate through his phone line. The boss mentions that he was talking to him this minute on the phone. The man replies that the squirrel only ate through the outgoing line.
185. A girl at work who always seemed to miss work a lot came up with this good one. She lived with her parents and her parents were on vacation. She told the boss she had to leave early because her parents were out of town and the dogs, the cats, and the bird did not like to be left home alone. So, the boss let her go home.
186. This one is true! A co-worker called in and said her dog ate her underwear and she didn't have any clean ones to wear. She said she would be in after she did some laundry!
187. I cannot come into work today. I have nausea, dizziness, body aches and vomiting. These are secondary symptoms brought on by the birth of my child yesterday.
188. A co-worker of mine used all of these in the same month: I'm sick...My girlfriend is sick...My girlfriend is pregnant and I have to take her to the doctor...My car broke down (he has three)...It's too windy...There's too much snow on the ground (he has a four-wheel drive, and the co-worker who lived two blocks away didn't but still made it in. I had a co-worker at a beef plant who's paternal grandfather died in September three years in a row.
189. I won't be in until later. I'm on Hawaii time during the morning, so it's only 6a.m. In the afternoon I'll revert back to local time.
190. I won't be into work today, or anymore. I just got a letter saying that I may have won 20 million dollars.
191. I was late for work because the night before my boyfriend and I were having sex and he decided to handcuff me to the bedpost and he forgot to bring the key so I had to wait till he came back with it and it was late the next day he loved it ...I did for awhile...true lol my boss laughed and that was it.
192. I live in a major metropolitan area, and my co-workers and I take public transportation to work. Living in the north we get our fair share of winter storms and snow accumulation. One day it had snowed about 12" of snow and I and another coworker started out to work walking the three blocks to catch the bus and then after the bus dropped us off, walking another 10 blocks through all the snow to the store. Boy were we amazed when a co-worker, who lives two blocks from the store, called to say she could not make it in because there was too much snow and the sidewalks were not shoveled!!!!
193. I once told my secretary not to expect too much from me this morning as I was suffering from from a mild case of mushroom poisoning following a trip overseas. I had a remarkably easy day one!
