Simpsons Qoutes...
- Thread starter MaddDogg
- Start date
Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."
Homer: Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?
Apu: Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamed it.
Homer: Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple of bags of Skittles.
Kent Brockman: Scientists say they're (New Springfield) also less attractive physically and while we speak in a well-educated manner, they tend to use low-brow expressions like 'oh yeah?' and 'com'ere a minute.'
Homer: Oh yeah? They think they're better than us, huh? Bart! Com'ere a minute.
Bart: You com'ere a minute."
Homer: Oh yeah?
Homer: A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. 6 feet tall, 300 pounds ... it makes ice.
Homer: All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?'.
and whenever someone does the 'YOINK!' I always die laughing
Homer: Got any of that beer that has candy floating in it? You know, Skittlebrau?
Apu: Such a beer does not exist, sir. I think you must have dreamed it.
Homer: Oh. Well, then just give me a six-pack and a couple of bags of Skittles.
Kent Brockman: Scientists say they're (New Springfield) also less attractive physically and while we speak in a well-educated manner, they tend to use low-brow expressions like 'oh yeah?' and 'com'ere a minute.'
Homer: Oh yeah? They think they're better than us, huh? Bart! Com'ere a minute.
Bart: You com'ere a minute."
Homer: Oh yeah?
Homer: A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. 6 feet tall, 300 pounds ... it makes ice.
Homer: All normal people love meat. If I went to a barbeque and there was no meat, I would say 'Yo Goober! Where's the meat!?'.
and whenever someone does the 'YOINK!' I always die laughing
Lou: Hey Chief, can I hold my gun sideways? It looks so cool.
Chief Wiggum: Haha, sure. Whatever you want, birthday boy.
Selma: Okay. Look at the eye chart and cover your left eye.
Abe: That's my seein eye. The right one's my winkin eye! (winks)
Selma: I'll give you your licence if you never do that again.
Abe: Can't I just use this picture? (Holds up newspaper clipping: OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD)
Homer: You sunk my Scrabble-ship!
Lisa: This game makes no sense.
Homer: Tell that to the good men that just lost their lives.
Some guy: Bro! You tapped the septic tank!
Abe: I hate this house! (Runs upstairs and plays music from the 20's)
Homer: Turn that down! You call that music?
Chief Wiggum: Haha, sure. Whatever you want, birthday boy.
Selma: Okay. Look at the eye chart and cover your left eye.
Abe: That's my seein eye. The right one's my winkin eye! (winks)
Selma: I'll give you your licence if you never do that again.
Abe: Can't I just use this picture? (Holds up newspaper clipping: OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD)
Homer: You sunk my Scrabble-ship!
Lisa: This game makes no sense.
Homer: Tell that to the good men that just lost their lives.
Some guy: Bro! You tapped the septic tank!
Abe: I hate this house! (Runs upstairs and plays music from the 20's)
Homer: Turn that down! You call that music?
Homer: What can I do to speed this whole thing up, doctor?
Dr. Nick: Be creative! Instead of making sandwiches with bread, use Pop Tarts. Instead of chewing gum, chew bacon.
Bart: You could brush your teeth with milkshakes!
Dr. Nick: Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?
Bart: (Daydreaming about being fat) I wash myself with a rag on a stick. (applause from small crowd)
Ralph: (on the bus) I heard your dad went into a restaraunt and ate everything in the restaraunt and they had to close the restaraunt.
Lisa: My dad may have gained some weight, but he's not some food-crazed maniac!
(Homer drives by in an ice cream truck, eating ice cream)
Movie Theatre Manager: If you would just quiet down, I'd be happy to treat you to a garbage bag full of popcorn.
Dr. Nick: Be creative! Instead of making sandwiches with bread, use Pop Tarts. Instead of chewing gum, chew bacon.
Bart: You could brush your teeth with milkshakes!
Dr. Nick: Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?
Bart: (Daydreaming about being fat) I wash myself with a rag on a stick. (applause from small crowd)
Ralph: (on the bus) I heard your dad went into a restaraunt and ate everything in the restaraunt and they had to close the restaraunt.
Lisa: My dad may have gained some weight, but he's not some food-crazed maniac!
(Homer drives by in an ice cream truck, eating ice cream)
Movie Theatre Manager: If you would just quiet down, I'd be happy to treat you to a garbage bag full of popcorn.
(At Radioactive Man movie audition)
Lunchlady Doris: (reading script) At last the world is safe, eh Fallout Boy?
Ralph: (trying out for Fallout Boy) What's for lunch tomorrow?
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them.
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them.
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them!
Lunchlady Doris: (reading script) At last the world is safe, eh Fallout Boy?
Ralph: (trying out for Fallout Boy) What's for lunch tomorrow?
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them.
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them.
Director: Up and atom!
McBain: Up and at them!
(Homer and Otto are high watching The 3 Stooges)
Marge: Homer, I don't mean to nag, but what does this have to do with healing your eyes?
Homer: As soon as I graduate, I am so outta here!
Homer: We gotta stop that initiative! Marge, I'm gonna need ten thousand veggie burritos.
Otto: No guac in mine!
Marge: Good night, Homer. (leaves)
Otto: Dude, your mom is hot!
Guy from Phish: (reading Moleman's prescription) Whoa. This guy is seriously ill.
Hans Moleman: My doctor never told me that. I had to hear it from Phish.
Otto: (Staring at hands) They're called fingers, but I've never seen them fing. Oh, there they go.
Marge: Homer, I don't mean to nag, but what does this have to do with healing your eyes?
Homer: As soon as I graduate, I am so outta here!
Homer: We gotta stop that initiative! Marge, I'm gonna need ten thousand veggie burritos.
Otto: No guac in mine!
Marge: Good night, Homer. (leaves)
Otto: Dude, your mom is hot!
Guy from Phish: (reading Moleman's prescription) Whoa. This guy is seriously ill.
Hans Moleman: My doctor never told me that. I had to hear it from Phish.
Otto: (Staring at hands) They're called fingers, but I've never seen them fing. Oh, there they go.
