Freedom Town: Aesthetic and Recreational Lawn Alternative

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Meta4iCAL

Raider Nation
Feb 21, 2005
19,635
4,278
113
37
Its this guys bday at my job so they ordered personal pizzas for everyone. I had a pizza with Italian sausage, pepporoni, fresh garlic, and basil. That shit was hella big too. I would have saved some, but I'm not going home after work and I didn't wanna waste it. Now i'm so fucking full. I don't wanna work the rest of the day, just sit at my desk and not do shit like a fat bastard
 

Nuttkase

not nolettuce
Jun 5, 2002
38,734
159,530
113
44
at the welfare mall
Its this guys bday at my job so they ordered personal pizzas for everyone. I had a pizza with Italian sausage, pepporoni, fresh garlic, and basil. That shit was hella big too. I would have saved some, but I'm not going home after work and I didn't wanna waste it. Now i'm so fucking full. I don't wanna work the rest of the day, just sit at my desk and not do shit like a fat bastard
Don't forget to take a dump while on the clock. Taking a long shit on the companies dime is one of the most rewarding feelings.
 

Nuttkase

not nolettuce
Jun 5, 2002
38,734
159,530
113
44
at the welfare mall
I'm pretty sure I've told this story on here, maybe even more then once, but back in 1999 I was chilling with my friend when a Pauly Shore movie came on and he said "Whatever happened to dude?" To which I automatically replied without even thinking "Oh he died like a year or so ago" and my friend is like "No way? What the fuck happened?" and I told him he died in a Ski-Doo accident lol. Anyways, fast foward a few months my friend and some other dudes rob this one guy, get caught, he gets locked up for 2 1/2 years for strong armed robbery. Fast foward even more to when he gets out and we are chilling at his spot watching Jay Leno or some shit like that and Pauly Shore is on there to promote his new movie (Funny enough it's called Pauly Shore Is Dead) when my friend is like "I thought you said he died in a Ski-Doo accident?" and I was all "Ohh, I was just kidding" and he replied "Man, we were watching one of his movies when I was locked up and I told everyone he was dead. Some of those fools are doing life and will never know he's not now." and I just started busting up laughing thinking that some dude sitting in Walla Walla State Pen for murder is bummed out thinking Pauly Shore is dead lol.
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