askG said:
good shit sixxness, im not hearing voices or nohting like that, but i got a feeling somehting is off inside of me, like a chemical imbalance or some phsycological shit, thats one of my biggest fears, of getting stuck with someone and they end up judging you, because were all human, hard not to judge others, even if they are trained.
You know, I had that feeling as well for awhile. I honestly do think that talking it out will be what helps you the most, in the long run. Drugs that make you feel "better" are only false happiness and a temporary fix. If you have any friends that you can talk to, I'd recommend that as well.
All this, "I'm a guy and I dont' need to talk about shit" attitude is fucking people over. I'm not trying to imply you are like that, but it's in the mind set of most guys, including myself at some times-even though I know that's bullshit. There's a lot of guy friends that you may not be able to talk to, but if you can get a balanced dicussion going, where you can talk to a male and female (same time or not) I think it'll help.
When I felt "off" it wasn't just because of ME. I thought there was some kind of chemical balance that had gone wrong with me, cause I was having a hard time with a lot of stuff.
The thing is, it's really about whatever works for you and makes you feel better. If talking to your friends helps you, and you feel you don't need therapy, that's great. If you decide therapy once every 2 weeks or once a month, that's great too. I think the main problem (I may be completely wrong) is that you don't have people that you can REALLY talk to, and tell them things that most people don't talk about, ie: feelings. Nobody talks about feelings anymore or anything in regard to that, and it's really sad. Cause that's why a lot of people have issues...They are made to feel like there is something wrong with them, and it's their issue, and nobody else has felt like that ever.
What helps me...is thinking about the fact that every single feeling and idea has been felt and thought before. While not being "alone" may not help in that regard, at least you know you're not fuckin' crazy. I saw you mention the weed thing....maybe you might wanna give it a rest for a little bit...Or honestly, it could be that you are stressed out about something and not even realize it. That shit happens to me sometimes, I start smoking more (weed and black n milds) and then after about 3-5 days, I'm thinkin to myself, "fuck, I'm stressed out..."
Oh....I should take this quote from "What About Bob?"
"The best therapist is the one right inside of yourself." This might sound corny or cliche but it's true. Nobody knows you better than YOU. You may not know why you feel things or whatever, but thinking about it and possibly discussing it with someone will help. I've talked to people that were judgemental pieces of shit, dont' go back a second time. If you're really serious about therapy, find someone that you can trust like a friend, or that you are comfortable with like they were your friend....rather than someone you're paying to help you organize shit in your head.
This is getting really long but I heard something the other day...."If you don't pay for therapy you won't change." One of my profs said it last week, basically saying people only change when they have to because they're spending money....I think while this might be true for some people, those that actually care about themselves will do whatever they can to better their life. As of right now, you're takin the first step and tryin to figure out what you wanna do to combat the issue(s) you're facing. On the real though, holla at me if you want, and good luck with all this.
