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  1. mrtonguetwista

    Damn!!!..that's a big ass squirrel

    THOMPSON, Ohio -- An elderly Ohio man with a broken leg was stuck hanging upside down in a tree for 10 hours before neighbors rescued him. Albert Rankel is in his 80s. He was cutting branches off his trees Sunday when he fell and got stuck on a limb. He hung screaming for help for hours. A...
  2. mrtonguetwista

    What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs on a plane...lol

    NEW YORK -- A woman sued Air France in federal court Friday, saying an employee told her she could not board a flight because she has no limbs. Adele Price, 42, who was born with birth defects caused by the leprosy treatment drug thalidomide, said at a news conference the employee told her that...
  3. mrtonguetwista

    I'll take a pallet of toilet paper, a case of batteries, and a coffin

    CHICAGO -- You can head into the next life at a discount -- thanks to Costco. Costco Wholesalers is testing a lay-away plan, an eternal one. Two Chicago area Costco's are selling caskets as part of test marketing. Both stories have kiosks where shoppers loading up on other bulk items can also...
  4. mrtonguetwista

    Bald Man Auctions Head For Ad Space

    CLEVELAND -- A Cleveland man has put the skin on his head up for sale on eBay. Jeremy Martin, 21, says he will tattoo the name and logo of the highest bidder on his bald head for a price. His one-year rate is $60,000. "I will not take less than that because I'm going to have a tattoo on the...
  5. mrtonguetwista

    Should've Put The Candy Yellow On The Bus

    SPOKANE, Wash. -- The bus isn't yellow -- and a high-school wrestling coach is seeing red. Coach Dan Randles has a custom-made shuttle bus for his team at Clarkston High School in Washington state. The 25-seat, airport-style shuttle cost team booster Steve Barham $25,000. But the team can't...
  6. mrtonguetwista

    Skyline Teen Killed...Gang Suspected

    (08-15-2004) - San Diego police reported Sunday that a 16-year-old Skyline boy shot in the stomach in a drive-by attack in Skyline died during surgery. According to SDPD Sgt. Diane Wendell, Lee Smith Jr. was standing by a bus stop in the 100 block of South Meadowbrook Drive about 9:15 p.m...
  7. mrtonguetwista

    Fuck...Don't Hire This Bitch To Tutor Your Child

    MINEOLA, N.Y. -- A woman hired to tutor an 11-year-old boy has pleaded guilty to rape and sexual abuse of the child and faces six months in jail and 10 years probation when she is sentenced later this year. Kathy Tuifel, 46, of Hicksville, pleaded guilty to one count of first-degree rape and...
  8. mrtonguetwista

    Stupid Ass School Bus Driver

    FONTANA — First-grader Sarah Macias was on her first school bus ride ever, but it ended with the child in tears and lost. The bus driver ordered off the bus. She was five miles away from her home. Luckily, a Rialto woman, Claudia Walker, spotted the frightened little girl and took her to the...
  9. mrtonguetwista

    Fuck...Dont Hire This Bitch To Be A Babysitter

    SAN ANTONIO -- A 4-year-old boy is hospitalized and his 16-year-old sister is in juvenile custody after she allegedly fed him marijuana and alcohol. Police say Jesse Rios was treated in the intensive care unit Wednesday night at Christus Santa Rosa Hospital for toxic ingestion and tremors after...
  10. mrtonguetwista

    Dumb Ass Burglar Story #914937493

    By Michael Ko Seattle Times staff reporter Julie Sanchez keeps a three-stone diamond ring and two pairs of 24-carat gold earrings in a ceramic container on her kitchen windowsill. But the man who broke into her Shoreline house early Sunday morning wasn't interested. Instead, the hungry...
  11. mrtonguetwista

    Stinky Situation

    CHICAGO (AP) -- A nice day on the Chicago River suddenly turned foul when black, smelly gunk landed on tourists. "I can only presume that perhaps it's human waste. There was a very strong smell to it," said Anita Pedersen, spokeswoman for the tour boat company. Witnesses on the Chicago's...
  12. mrtonguetwista

    "Cheer Naked"

    GAINESVILLE, Fla. -- University of Florida's cheerleading coach is being fired after giving the squad permission to wear sexually explicit T-shirts at a cheerleading camp. Gene Moore says he was unfairly terminated for allowing squad members to wear the shirt that listed "Ten Reasons to Cheer...
  13. mrtonguetwista

    Aug. 17th. Releases *Hurricane Edition*

    I'm posting dates a day earlier than usual because I don't know how long we will be without electricity when Hurricane Charley hits tonight. Hopefully the crib will still be standing when the lights come back on. Coming August 17, 2004 Akrobatik "Akrobatik: The EP" Anaboys "Perfect Timin"...
  14. mrtonguetwista

    Aug. 17th. Releases *Hurricane Edition*

    I'm posting dates a day earlier than usual because I don't know how long we will be without electricity when Hurricane Charley hits tonight. Hopefully the crib will still be standing when the lights come back on. Coming August 17, 2004 Akrobatik "Akrobatik: The EP" Anaboys "Perfect Timin"...
  15. mrtonguetwista

    Aug. 17th. Releases *Hurricane Edition*

    I'm posting dates a day earlier than usual because I don't know how long we will be without electricity when Hurricane Charley hits tonight. Hopefully the crib will still be standing when the lights come back on. Coming August 17, 2004 Akrobatik "Akrobatik: The EP" Anaboys "Perfect Timin"...
  16. mrtonguetwista

    60 Minute's Mike Wallace Is A Sav

    MANHATTAN-August 11, 2004 — "60 Minutes" correspondent Mike Wallace, arrested in a dispute with parking enforcement inspectors, says he wonders why anyone thought that he, at age 86, was a threat. Wallace was handcuffed and taken to police precinct headquarters after the incident Tuesday...
  17. mrtonguetwista

    Prisoner Glues Himself To Girlfriend

    MADRID - A German prison inmate and his girlfriend glued their hands together while she was visiting him at a Madrid jail, Spanish state radio RNE reported Friday. The German couple were taken to hospital, where doctors decided to operate on them only if solvents failed to work against the...
  18. mrtonguetwista

    Trade Sex For Votes Against Bush

    My fault bout the other thread....had the wrong site listed. Here's the new one http://www.fthevote.com/
  19. mrtonguetwista

    Give Me My Shopping Cart Bitch!!

    VINELAND, N.J. -- A dispute over a pushcart at a Home Depot store escalated into a duel between two patrons armed with 2-by-4 boards, leaving one of them with a wound to his chin and both under arrest. Police charged Wei Sun, 45, of Upper Darby, Pa., and Larry Bostic, 52, of Vineland with...
  20. mrtonguetwista

    DJ Strong and Kurupt

    Palm Trees And Gangstas Mixtape Vol 1 1. CaliUntouchableDJs.com / StrongHouseRecords.com Intro 2. Kurupt In The Streets 3. Crooked I/E40/Yukmouth - Cali G's 4. Spice 1/Kurupt - Thug World 5. Riflemen-Mobb Deep/Jayo Felony/40 Glocc/ Kurupt - Hoods 6. Riflemen-Mobb Deep/Jayo Felony/40 Glocc/...