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Funny Shit (complete story) I just wanted to take a ride and pick up two bundles of heroin. But Wayne has to jump out of the car and start beating the shit out of some young black kid that he had apparently experienced bad dealings with. I am not even from York I have no idea what...

Women love my roommate Ralph. Ralph is a smooth talker. He knows exactly what women love to hear, which, to me, is a complete mystery. It also doesn't hurt him that he looks astonishingly like Billy Dee Williams, only with more muscle. And he's got a huge wang. This is why my friend Ralph is...

My friend Ravi and I had been working at the same gas station for about 5 months now. Ravi pumped gas, and I ran the convenience store of the gas station, which meant that I had rang up food purchases, restocked the shelves, and was master of the keys for both the men's and women's bathrooms...

think it's time for me to move on from my job. for the past two years i have been employed through a fortune 500 company. through these past two years, my hard work and diligence has led me to an office with a window and a secure hold on the lower ledges of the payroll. by office i mean cubicle...

Breakfast made it's way to my large intestine around 2:48 pm. As I toward the bathroom to relieve myself, only a few things crossed my mind. I wished for a clean and empty stall, a full roll of toilet paper, and hoped a kind soul had left something in the john for my reading enjoyment. I rounded...

It's easy to create good posts. Try Copy & Paste. > Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the > mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there. > > Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away > from a toilet to avoid airborne...

After nearly ten years of marriage, I am slowly beginning to realize that my wife has been fucking with my head. Granted, as the typical male half of the species, I'm kinda slow when it comes to the sassy and subtle things she says to me. Some friends of ours are going to take our...

Crazy Joe and the Gang (96 hits) Category: Humor -> Dumb Jobs Rating: 1.4 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (View all ratings) Submitted by <amynicole30.at.sbcglobal.net> (View user info) at 2004-07-17 01:04:55 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------...

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn't live there. If a cow laughed, would milk come out...

http://www.ubersite.com/m/36852 i cant believe sometime took the time to actually write this

Beware the Clitoris Ring I was grinding against her, but that wasn't enough. She lifted her leg into me, bringing me dangerously close to a premature explosion. Curling her fingers underneath my shirt, she lifted and pulled it off. "So," I grinned, "That's how you want it, is it?" She...

Exploiting Peer-to-Peer Networking: I have lost all faith in humanity. (162737 hits) Category: Humor -> Dirty Humor Rating: 1.56 on 506 reviews (Rate this item) (View all ratings) Submitted by Tom (View user info) at 2004-04-05 04:09:33...

When I was a kid, all I wanted was to be rich. I'd tell my mom all the time about how when I was rich I'd have three big houses, or 9 fast cars, or 20 computers, or a thousand CD's, or any expensive material thing that I could think of. Sure, when I was a kid, I thought that once you were rich...

Its a good life its a good life, the signs are plain to see when a nigga feel high and he aint smoked no weed When the sunrise come and its been foggy all week police passed... they aint stoppin for me i might be broke and got nothin to eat but life is good as long as i got a place to sleep...

man...picked up some new Apple Koolaid right...though it was gonna be off the hook....MAn they done fuck shit up,this is shit menthol koolaid...its actually has menthol in it...its supposed to be "the cool you can feel"....i shoulda read the whole damn label.... why the fuck would you put...

Digital downloads to get "gold" sales records Recording Industry Association of America announced this week that it will add the legal digital download statistics to its "gold" and "platinum" sales certifications. In near future, gold award will be awarded to a song that has been...

been seein promo for this quite a bit...anyone got info?

anyone ordered their copy...i ordered mine about a month ago and aint got shit....still waitin... Anyone?

ok, while recording in Acid or Vegas....the beat is on track 1, vocal on track 2 and backups on track 3.... track 2 is right on time with the beat......but the overdubs on track 3 come out too soon or too late...hella off in timing...they dont match up... i've tried adjusting everything and it...

Step into my world fulla darkness, hate and greed A grimy little village fulla grinders, pickpockets and thieves Where a dime bag gone cost you fifteen Hungry niggaz raised on top ramen, hot dogs and government cheese We bleed copper cause the love of money flows through of veins Tryin to start...