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  1. mrtonguetwista

    Happy Birthday DJ Mark 7

    :chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese::chinese:
  2. mrtonguetwista

    Woman Turns Table On TSA, Gropes Agent

    PHOENIX -- Police arrested a Longmont woman Thursday afternoon, after she allegedly grabbed the breast of a Transportation Security Administration agent at Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix. Sgt. Steve Martos, of the Phoenix Police Department, issued a statement saying, “A woman entered the...
  3. mrtonguetwista

    Happy Birthday Infinity

    :siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness::siccness:
  4. mrtonguetwista

    Wife Arrested After Trying To Smuggle Husband Out Of Jail In A Suitcase

    CHETUMAL, Mexico (KTLA) -- A woman has been arrested after police say she tried to smuggle her husband out of jail in a suitcase. The woman, who is the man's common law wife, had been allowed to visit the man for a conjugal visit, police in Mexico say. Prison guards noticed something was...
  5. mrtonguetwista

    Happy Birthday 50cal

    One step closer to your Social Security benefits 50 getting ready to get his party on:
  6. mrtonguetwista

    R.I.P. Sherwood Schwartz (Brady Bunch)

    LOS ANGELES (AP) — Sherwood Schwartz, writer-creator of two of the best-remembered TV series of the 1960s and 1970s, "Gilligan's Island" and "The Brady Bunch," has died at age 94. Great niece Robin Randall said Schwartz died at 4 a.m. Tuesday at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, where he was being...
  7. mrtonguetwista

    Woman Delivers 16lb Baby

    WASHINGTON — A newborn who tipped the scales at more than 16 pounds (7.3 kilograms) broke the local hospital's weight records in Longview, Texas, press reported Monday. The baby boy, named JaMichael, delivered by Cesarean section to parents Janet Johnson and Michael Brown early Friday, exceeded...
  8. mrtonguetwista

    More Than 40 People Killed In Mexico In A 24hr Period

    MEXICO CITY (AP) — Fighting among the Zetas gang and other vicious drug cartels led to the deaths of more than 40 people whose bodies were found in three Mexican cities over a 24-hour span, a government official said Saturday. At least 20 people were killed and five injured when gunmen opened...
  9. mrtonguetwista

    Bananas

    STRONGSVILLE, Ohio (AP) -- The manager of a cell phone store in Ohio called 911 to report a gorilla had been attacked by a banana. The Wireless Center in Strongsville, near Cleveland, advertises at curbside with a man in a gorilla suit. Manager Brandon Parham says he was watching last week as a...
  10. mrtonguetwista

    600LB Woman Shoots For New World Record

    OAK BRIDGE, N.J. -- At 600 pounds, a New Jersey mother is less than half the size of the woman who the Guinness Book of World Records says is the heaviest that ever lived, but she might have a shot at a new category: most massive mom. Donna Simpson, 42, has renounced her desire to achieve the...
  11. mrtonguetwista

    Bitch I'm Bill Belamy

    GOqrbTlr6SA&sns
  12. mrtonguetwista

    The ol' woman dies after sex with dog story

    LIMERICK COUNTY, Ireland (KTLA) -- A man is facing life in prison in connection with the death of his girlfriend died after having sex with his Alsatian dog. According to The Sun, 57-year old Sean McDonnell is the first person ever tried under the legislation banning sex with animals...
  13. mrtonguetwista

    Jail Inmate: Lack Of Porn Violates US Constitution

    MOUNT CLEMENS, Mich. (AP) -- A Michigan jail inmate says he's being subjected to cruel and unusual punishment because he can't have pornography. In a handwritten lawsuit, 21-year-old Kyle Richards claims his civil rights are being violated at the Macomb County Jail. Richards says denying his...
  14. mrtonguetwista

    San Jose's Own Joey Chestnut Does It Again!

    NEW YORK -- World record-holder Joey "Jaws" Chestnut again won Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest in Monday in New York. Chestnut swallowed a whopping 62 dogs in 10 minutes at the Fourth of July tradition. That's six hot dogs shy of his world record. It was also Chestnut's fifth...
  15. mrtonguetwista

    Now that's what you call a "police involved shooting"

    SOUTHWEST MIAMI-DADE, Fla. (WSVN) -- Police said four subjects have been fatally wounded after shots were fired during a confrontation with police officers. The incident occurred at about 9:30 p.m. Thursday at a home near of 216th Street and Southwest 189th Avenue. Miami-Dade Police received a...
  16. mrtonguetwista

    ...

    COLLIER COUNTY, Fla. -- It looked like the scene out of a video game; and indeed an Xbox was behind a SWAT team invading a suburban Florida home. The SWAT invasion turned out to be a hoax, but police aren’t laughing. The family at the butt of the joke, on the other hand, can't tell their tale...
  17. mrtonguetwista

    Tattoo Gang Who Misspelled 'RAPEST' on Man's Head Jailed

    OKLAHOMA CITY, OK (KTLA) -- Four people convicted of viciously beating a man and tattooing 'RAPEST' on his forehead have been sentenced to prison. Richard Dellert, Zachary Provence, Kimberly Vergara and Lorena Hodges pleaded guilty Tuesday in the April attack on 18-year-old Stetson Johnson. As...
  18. mrtonguetwista

    Man Tosses Weed, Lands On Cop Car

    BUFFALO, N.Y. — State police say a man's effort to ditch some drugs from a moving car in western New York didn't exactly go as planned. Troopers with the state police Thruway detail say 20-year-old Sean Schmidt was standing with his upper body sticking out the sunroof of a vehicle...
  19. mrtonguetwista

    Woman Sprays Cops With Tiddie Milk

    DELAWARE, Ohio (KTLA) -- A woman is behind bars after allegedly spraying sheriff's deputies with breast milk. It happened Saturday as Delaware County deputies were responding to a domestic dispute. The woman's husband told deputies his wife had been drinking at a wedding and hit him before...
  20. mrtonguetwista

    Fuck the T.S.A.

    DESTIN (CBS4) – A gravely ill 95-year-old woman had to remove her wet diaper at an airport so that she could be patted down by security screeners and nearly missed her flight, her daughter said Monday. During the pat-down, Transportation Security Administration inspectors found a mass on Lena...