Evil Dave Letterman Visits. 03/30/05. 7:30am
After the commercials Fred was playing some rap music but Howard said that he's really sick of that stuff and he doesn't really like any rap music. He used to like some of Eminem's stuff but not anymore. Evil Dave Letterman (not the real guy) was sitting in the studio as well so he started to tell some of his pre-written jokes. Evil Dave talked about the kidnapping plot for his son and cracked some jokes about how an abortion would have been cheaper than ransom for the kid. Dave said that the whole kidnapping thing had him down a bit but then asked Howard if he had any ''hot whores'' coming in today. Howard told Dave about the Stump the Perv game they had coming up with Richard Christy.
Evil Dave was talking about what he'd like to do to the guy who wanted to kidnap his kid. He was saying that he'd like to have someone rip down his pants and rape him... and he'd like to be the one to do it. Evil Dave said he'd like to torture the guy a bit by making him sit through an hour long interview with Ace Frehley.
Howard got back to Evil Dave and let him tell a few more jokes. As usual, Dave misread some of his lines and screwed up the jokes he was trying to tell. He said the word ''emancipated'' instead of ''emaciated'' in one of his jokes. Artie seemed to think that was pretty funny since the guy screws up his lines every time he's on the show. Howard played some of the Pat O'Brien clips he was playing yesterday. He said that there was an article in the paper today where the reporter said that Pat really does have to leave that show he's on because of what he's done.
Evil Dave asked Howard ''Who do you think moves more during sex, Terri Schiavo or a Jewish Chick.'' Howard got a laugh out of that and said that Dave was going to stick around during the upcoming Stump the Perv game. The guy who was coming in to compete against Richard Christy is a guy who is 60 years old and has a huge porn collection in his basement... and his mother lives with him. Howard went to break a short time later.
Evil Dave told a joke that got the delay hit during the news. He then screwed up another joke by saying the word ''Oracle'' instead of ''Orifice'' while telling a joke about Terri Schiavo. Dave was given a bunch of funny jokes that he told during the news. He did have the delay hit on him a couple of times though. One of the jokes that we didn't hear, led to a discussion about Scott DePace and how he was willing to let a guy do weird things to him for a mere $20,000. Some of the stuff they were talking about was getting cut out by the delay button so we missed out on quite a bit of the conversation. Howard ended the show around 10:25am.
