need thoughtz

[DaNalej4-SHO]

Im a young nigga tryin to improve wit my lyricz an flow... i would like any thoughtz on how to make my shit better, breath control, voice, lyricz anything that would help me out...one luv

http://www.searchmpthree.com/musicdownload.asp?im=5437

 

[MrDontGIVEaFUCK]

it aint bad.. kepe it up.. get a beat behind it...

 

[Juan Million]

That was pretty tight, but it's easy to hear the parts when ya run out of breath. Also, certain parts where you repeated a word twice like "gotta gotta", ya sped it up too fast. Work on the consistancy of your flow.

Good shit 4-sho.

 

[tank locc]

sounds kinda tight

 

[DaNalej4-SHO]

thanx fa tha feedback via private messages.good lookin out.n.e. more tips on breath control?hit a nigga up.One.4-SHO

 

[CHRISHOGGALYPSE]

personally, i don't see what kinda beat you can put that behind. i think alot of rappin is delivery. some of the shit eminem says wouldn't normally rhyme, but it is his delivery you dig. you got potential, but i think you should also put some kinda emphasis on your words, let people feel what you are sayin instead of givin em a confused look on their face tryna decipher your shit, cause it kinda runs together. keep it up though homie